Happiness@TheSpeedofLife: Four Powerful Choices to Live and Lead Happier
Published: Wed, 05/21/14
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Edition 114: Four Powerful Choices to Live and Lead Happier |
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1678 words of content including powerful practices live a healthier life. Approximate reading time: 6.71 minutes. If you're particularly stressed today, skip directly to section II for a 1-min stress reduction. And isn't your Happiness worth it? This newsletter speaks to Leadership, Happiness, and Coaching in your life and work. If you received this from a friend, SUBSCRIBE now to get your own copy in the future. |
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As the Affordable Care Act rolls out, we hear much conversation on the cost of healthcare and the critical importance of taking personal responsibility for one's health. Most headlines about Wellness focus on physical practices. Yet there is more to Wellness. Imagine the power of using your whole self - head, heart, AND body - to create outcomes that are more positive for you and everyone around you. In this month's essay you will learn how to better manage the emotional space you bring to your roles as a leader, co-worker, parent, or partner - through how you use language, body, and breath. I invite you to share these tools with your world. Sickness versus Wellness
Wellness is defined as "the state or condition of being in good physical and mental health." This may seem obvious, but notice that our core healthcare model (as practiced in the United States, at least) is a Sickness model - we only pay attention to our health when it is absent, at which point we go to a doctor and say, "fix me!" Wellness focuses on personal responsibility for preventing breakdowns before they occur. It's your job to create and maintain your health. The healthcare system is (slowly) shifting to support a wellness conversation. But you need not wait; you already have the power to improve your quality of life by making different choices. The "Big Four"
The healthcare system often speaks of The "Big Four" drivers of cost:
The Big Four account for 75% of chronic disease, 81% of hospital stays, 91% of prescription drugs, and 76% of office visits (source: Cleveland Clinic/TowersWatson, 2011 study) Each of these four factors has an emotional side, as well. Here are some tips for overcoming the Big Four for a Happier, Healthier You. 1. Food Choice and Portion Control
You are what you eat. When you eat high-energy food, you feel great. If you eat crap, you feel like crap. The same applies in the emotional realm. What do you feed your emotional self? Do you practice Gratitude...or Gossip? Do you feed yourself more drama and network news (War! Famine! Terrorists! Danger! The water from your tap may be killing you!) Or do you look for the good news and the upside and the humor in life? If you notice you feel sad/angry/depressed after interacting with certain people, try cutting back on your exposure to them. Skip the first 10 minutes of the nightly news for a week, and notice how your anxiety levels decrease. On the flip side, pay attention to which environments and interactions leave you feeling energized and happy. Treat yourself to more of those. 2. Tobacco and Toxins
We all know the many ways in which tobacco use decreases life span and reduces quality of life for those who become addicted to it. Emotional toxins can have a similar impact on well being, so let's do a quick audit of your "addictions." What do "toxins of the soul" look like? Thinking always of what could go wrong. Waking up every day and listing all the injustices others have inflicted on you. Focusing on what is wrong in the world, in your life, on your job. Dwelling on all that you've lost, the people who have died or left you. Saying terrible things to that image in the mirror - that you are not smart/pretty enough, or you should have done a better job of
These daily toxins steep you in negative emotions - anxiety, worry, resentment, resignation, fear, insecurity, anger, sadness, self-deprecation, and hopelessness. While each of these emotions has a place - occasionally - when you live in them constantly they eventually wear you down and kill optimism, hope, and happiness. What might you cut back to reduce the negativity you keep feeding yourself? Or what might you replace these habits with? What if you substitute a daily joy list for a daily listing of injustices? Or create positive affirmations in place of your negative self-talk? Or spend five minutes each day appreciating what you DO have instead of what is missing? 3. Physical Inactivity
When your body is not exercised sufficiently, your muscles and bones become weaker, and your metabolism slows. Over time you spiral downward: a weaker body finds it tougher to exercise, a slower metabolism means weight gain, it's harder to move as you weigh more, etc. One cure for physical inactivity is to make it easier. Rather than seek hours you don't have, fit your fitness into tiny spaces that already exist, e.g. use part of your lunch break to walk around; skip the elevator; have stand-up meetings (bonus: they'll be shorter!); or march in place for a few minutes while you watch TV. Using your body is also a powerful way to create new and/or stronger emotions for yourself. An exercise I do often with clients is to "put on" the emotion they'd rather be feeling. When a client wants to feel more self-confidence, happiness, or calm, for example, I invite them to stand in a confident body, or a happy or calm body. I don't have to tell them how - the body knows. A confident body is taller and more grounded. A happy body looks up and smiles. A calm body involves deeper breathing and open shoulders. Whatever it is, we then work to define a daily physical practice for that emotion. "Fake It Till You Make It" is a powerful path to creating stronger emotional muscles. Put on the mood or emotion you want to feel, and do that several times each day. After a month, you'll notice you genuinely feel it more often and it's easier to get to that place.
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4. The Complicating Factor: Stress
Stress is positive in periodic doses - a project deadline kicks up your productivity; new demands often drive creativity; the desire to do a quality job keeps you alert and engaged. As you move up the stress curve, productivity and satisfaction often increase... until you hit your maximum stress capacity. From there additional stress becomes DIStress. Productivity, creativity, and engagement decrease. Stress held for too long in the body affects your emotional resiliency as well as your physical body (literally - which is why stress is a healthcare issue!). The good news: Did you know that 100% of stress is self-created? Everything that happens in the world is neutral; nothing "out there" creates your stress. It's the STORY you tell yourself about it that generates a stress/fear response. You make a mistake (neutral fact) and you wallow in regret or self-criticism long after the event occurs. Or you fret, worry, or freeze up over some future event that's yet to occur. Most stress occurs when you "time travel" like that - living in the past or future in your head, telling yourself a disaster story that is either history or fiction. And it is why Mindfulness is one of the most powerful cures for stress.
Mindfulness includes any practice that helps you focus on NOW and simply noticing, without judgment, what is (vs. what was or what might be). Meditation is the rock star of mindfulness, but there are many more accessible forms. Yoga can be a form of it. So can taking a walk, watching the sun rise/set, or eating a meal with your full attention. By far the simplest form of mindfulness is something you're already doing, all the time: Breathing. Let's demonstrate. I invite you to watch your next two breaths (I'll wait...). So what happened in the last few seconds? If you are like most people, you took a deeper breath than in the moment before you paid attention, on purpose. And in that moment of paying attention to your breath, where were your thoughts? On your breathing, right? Which is only happening right now. You briefly stopped time traveling. And while you were paying attention to only Now, just your Breath, what happened to your stress? You set it down for a minute. You gave your system a break, and let a tiny bit of your stress go. Repeat daily. Your stress won't disappear, but you may find it easier to carry. Enjoy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~
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I'm currently engaged with several organizations that seek to change their culture. They are in different circumstances, industries, and sizes, and their reasons for the change are varied. But in every case, we've identified that, somewhere along the way, communication from the top leader became inconsistent or erratic, and in the absence of a clear message people started making up their own version of things and... well, one day they came into work and realized everyone was on a different page. The symptoms of communication breakdown differ - customer service issues, lack of direction, low morale, or simply missed opportunities. But the cost is always high, and the solution almost always tied to more and better communication from those in charge. As the president of my first employer used to say constantly, "It is impossible to over communicate. And it's my top job." Remember, Leadership is not about a title: Anyone can be a Leader who makes clear and complete communication a priority, every day and in every interaction. ~~~*~~~*~~~ Do you seek support to create the new Leadership habits you will need to succeed at the next level? To explore how you can engage a coach to make that happen faster and easier, write me back or visit here for more info.
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Contact me if you seek more Happiness, Leadership, and balance in your life. If you received this from a friend, SUBSCRIBE now to get your own copy in the future, plus you'll get a valuable leadership report! All things Happiness Coach:  
 View past editions at http://www.TheExecutiveHappinessCoach.com/resources/archives/. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Happiness is a decision,
not an event.
How will YOU decide
today?
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The Executive Happiness Coach® is a global provider of Executive Coaching and mentoring services. With clients in nearly 30 countries, my passion is to help build a Happier world and workplace, one Leader at a time.