These amazing coaches are definitely not being wallpaper! (see #11)

26 Points of Wisdom from the Global Coach Conference

The following ideas jumped out at me and got me thinking and excited to share. A few of the these have attribution, but most are my synthesis, what I grokked from the speaker. Please, take what resonates and leave the rest!

1. Today is the slowest day you’ll ever experience for the rest of your life. We say this as though it is some surprise that we’re just discovering. But think about it: if you are alive today, this has been true every day since you were born. You already know how to do it, to live in a today that is always faster than yesterday. So, when are we going to stop arguing the point and simply relax into the ride?
    
2. Know when to say No. To survive and thrive in the world you must establish and maintain strong boundaries for yourself. Boundaries are essential to manage energy, relationships, and focus.
    
3. “We can be better“ starts with “I can be better.“ This is a modern version of the famous Gandhi quote, “be the change you want to see in the world.” When you point a finger at others, notice the three pointing back at you.
    
4. A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. This feels so true today, yet versions of this sentiment have been around for hundreds of years. We think we are unique, but human beings have always been this way :-) <see attributions here>
    
5. Rationality and Emotionality are not separate. Every thought we have is emotionally influenced. Neuroscience and research continue to show us that neutral decision-making or “we don’t do emotions” is pure fiction. Thinking and feeling are inextricably interwoven. Thus, it is critical to recognize and manage your own and others’ emotions.
    
6. Complaint: I don’t know what to say. Response: So, ask a question! The era of anyone knowing everything is ancient history. Most of the time, in most situations, you’ll have access to only a fraction of “knowledge.” The future belongs to those who master the skills of Inquiry.
    
7. Systems depend on our willingness to keep silence. When you sense injustice or inequity, speak up. Recent history has proven to us that speaking aloud is both dangerous (for those who are first) and incredibly powerful, for once light is shed it is impossible for good people to look away and pretend any longer. Be the light.
    
8. What is it you think you need that you don’t have? This is the essence of coaching. Whether you are a professional coach or a leader trying to support someone on your team, coaching is about helping people name the gap then close that gap.
    
9. The brain’s main job is to manage resources in service of getting oxygen and glucose to your cells. Everything else that has evolved in human beings serves that primary role. Period. Every dimension of who we are as humans comes down to our survival as beings at a cellular level.  Lisa Feldman Barrett’s presentation was one of the most mind-blowing of the conference for me. She challenged us to think WAY beyond EQ and the body. I ordered her book, How Emotions are Made, before I even left the hall!
    
10. Words make Worlds. Speaking is a generative act.
     
11. Your job is NOT to be Wallpaper. Whatever you’ve been given, use it. Show up. Be you. The world needs all the help it can get!
     
12. We still believe that deep expertise and planning are the keys to success, but in a VUCA* world, flexibility and diverse thinking are exponentially more important, for no matter what you think you know or how well you’ve planned, what’s needed for tomorrow will be different from what you could even imagine yesterday.                  
    *Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, Ambiguous
     
13. “What are my choices?” Ask this question often and your world will transform. All of our stuckness is grounded in thinking that our current path is our only option.
     
14. It’s a futile mission to be liked. So do what’s right because it’s right.
     
15. Don’t be afraid to be wrong. Corollary to the prior point. “Wrong” is often a construct or rule, not a truth. See also #7. By speaking you can change what’s perceived as right.
     
16. In mastery, perfectionism does not exist. The Paradox of Mastery is that the more you know (in a field), the more you accept that you don’t know. The Master is also, always, a Beginner. This is as true in fields of study as it is in sports – the great ones never stop practicing the fundamentals.
     
17. Have you ever NOT made it through suffering? No. You’re still here. So why not trust yourself?
     
18. You make time for what’s important. When you say “I don’t have time,“ what you’re really saying is, “this is not important to me. “
     
19. Mastery in Coaching is the deepening of Presence, not the perfection of Skills. I love this line because I can substitute the word Leadership for Coaching and it is also true.
     
20. If they ask a question, trust they are an adult and can handle the truth. We too often treat others as fragile or volatile, so we lie to protects their feelings. But if you understand the distinction between being Nice (telling the other what you think they WANT to hear) vs Kind (telling the other what they NEED to hear), you can also distinguish between being Blunt versus Direct. So, when someone asks your opinion, why not give it to them?
     
21. “We do not learn from our experiences, we learn from reflecting on our experiences.“ John Dewey, 1910, educator. This bit of wisdom from 109 years ago still stands as a foundational truth today.
     
22. My job, as a human being, is to be the best I can be - even if it makes others uncomfortable. This is the prime argument for diversity and inclusion. Everyone has a right to dignity, and no one, EVER, has made the world a better place by diminishing themselves. You have a voice. Use it!
     
23. “What are you committed to more than your fear?“ You must answer this question to climb your own mountain, whatever that is for you.
     
24. If you think of yourself as a Troublemaker, you are living at the best time in human history to be that. So why not?  The question resonated with me because last year I began to include “troublemaker” as an alternate title in my professional bio. Someone’s got to stir the pot, right?!
     
25. Worry less about whether you are in center then whether you can find center. Center is not a place to live; it is a place to visit -- for healing, awareness, rebalancing, and access to choice.
    This statement parallels something you’ve all heard me say many times about Happiness, that it’s not a place to live all the time (where’s ambition, perseverance, righteous anger, sadness for loss, etc?) but don’t you want to be able to go there occasionally to refill your oxygen tank? Same for being in Center, calm, choice. And you can’t go there if you don’t know where it is.