787 words of content, including little awesomeness moments and a reminder of the Power of Listening. Approximate content reading time: 3.14 minutes. And isn't your Happiness worth it?

This newsletter speaks to Leadership, Happiness, and Coaching in your life and work.

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Part 1: From The Pandemic Lockdown, Day 159

How long have you been in lockdown, or working from home, or having to balance kids and job and worry about returning to school, or feeling separated from loved ones? Too long, right?

I thought I was doing OK. Then two weeks ago (day 143, but who’s counting?) I had a complete meltdown — to the point where my wife had to remove me from the house and take me on a walk around the neighborhood so we could talk.

and talk.

and talk.

AND I felt tremendously better afterward. It was a great reminder for me of the power of JUST LISTENING. Cheryl did not try to fix me or argue with me. She just kept asking me questions and eventually I found my way back from the angry emotional space where I’d been feeling trapped. Shortly after my comeback, I learned there’s such a thing as COVID Brain! It’s the name therapists are starting to give to the pervasive sense of isolation + anxiety + helplessness, etc., we are all feeling.

            The CDC. A new report found that depression symptoms among Americans were four                   times  higher in June of this year (compared to last year). And that anxiety symptoms                   were three times as high. The increase was especially notable in young adults, essential               workers, and unpaid caregivers As well as minorities. The CDC said support systems to               address these mental health concerns "will continue to be needed urgently."

Comfort in numbers? I don’t know about you, but even if I still feel trapped sometimes, it makes me feel better just knowing that IT’S NOT JUST ME!

And I promise if any of you need someone to JUST LISTEN, I’ll make the space for you.  Or reach out to a friend or family member and ask them to simply witness you. 

No fixing, no pity, no suggesting strategy.  Request they hold the space for you to unpack your stinky baggage. Once you’re done, you’ll know what to do. Trust yourself.

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Part 2: Coaching Conversations

I have a client who has struggled w/ depression in the past and is struggling with isolation now. In a recent coaching session (in which he wanted to “work through some of the negative shit”), I asked him this question:

What are you learning about yourself as a result of having to live in lockdown for five months?

After one or two self-deprecating comments, he slowed down and became reflective. I won’t share everything he said, but the core theme became, “I’m both stronger and more fragile than I realized.”

Aren’t we all? I hope you’re noticing how fragile are the threads that hold your life together, yet how resilient you have been under stress. Take time to give yourself credit for that. Perhaps, like my client, you are learning that those threads are like a spider’s – able to hold a lot more tension than you would have guessed!

Part 3: Awesomeness

One of my favorite writers has been posting daily bits of Pandemic Awesomeness. Inspired, I’ve been working on my own list.

• Discovering that I DO have the motivation to exercise even though the gyms are closed
• Having fresh baked bread twice a week for the past 20 weeks – because there’s no place to go on the weekends!
• Naming our sourdough culture because we spend more time with it than actual people
• Getting to know our postal carrier’s entire life history because we are home every day when the mail arrives
• Never having to worry about forgetting my lunch at home
• Haven’t had to iron anything since… what’s an iron, again?
• Organizing five years of digital photos
• Dusting my shoes
• Sending a big donation to the food bank because I haven’t been buying that daily latte
• Having time to fold my underwear and match my socks
• No one knows if I spill coffee on my pants
• Corollary to above: Who cares what it looks like if it can’t be seen on video?!
• Playing with fun Virtual Backgrounds on Zoom
• Listening to my favorite artist’s new album - ten times in a row
• Finding an old box of Girl Scout cookies in the back of the freezer, and they’re still good!

And of course, if you’ve been following my adventures:

• Pond Mucking! This project would never have taken off if not for quarantine. 

Your turn. What are the little awesomenesses you’ve stumbled upon in pandemic quarantine? Write them down. Invite others to share theirs on your next family or friends’ online social hour.

Remember: Leadership is not about a title. Anyone can be a leader who is able to hold a space for positivity and resilience when everyone else is feeling stretched to their limit.

Bonus Resource: The Upside of Trauma

    The upside of trauma – what are you learning about yourself? https://markmanson.net/newsletters/mindfck-monday-44

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Seeking support for your Happiness in COVID times? Post this summary of The 13 Principles of Happiness and on your refrigerator or WFH desk to remind you that every day, you have options.

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