1900 words of content, including 45+ lessons that emerged from the pandemic. Approximate content reading time: 7.60 minutes, and isn’t your Happiness worth it?

This newsletter speaks to Leadership, Happiness, and Coaching in your life and work.

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Photo credit: https://yayimages.com/artist/stuartmiles  

I. Lessons Learned from a Pandemic Year

A while back I dropped a quick note to y’all inviting you to reflect–in a positive way–on what you learned from the “dumpster fire” that was 2020. I continue to ask that question in every meeting and talk I attend. And what rich sharing it has been!

While media headlines have highlighted gloom and despair, your notes remind me that despite hardships we are, all of us, still looking for the bright side. We used adversity to fuel our creative selves. We reached out to others. We reinvented everything.

For some, there was grief – in a pandemic, people die, and that was real. For others, loss led to frustration and anger. Mostly you were happy to have figured out home schooling, WFH, and grocery shopping without contact. It was the little things.

On this one-year anniversary of the Pandemic, let’s reflect on what you LEARNED

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Biggest Takeaways

1. Gratitude kept many of you from drowning. “Though 2020 had many personal and professional setbacks, in the end I have so much to be thankful for” and “ ’I am grateful,’ became my daily mantra.”
2. Basics Work: Just Breathe. “I love change and a challenge. This year provided an over-abundance of both. And just when I thought I couldn't take anymore, I made it through. My lesson: one breath at a time.” 
3. Live Your Life NOW, Not Later. Tomorrow is not guaranteed, so you need to prioritize what you do and with whom, and actually DO IT - because you might not get the chance if you wait!
4. Kindness Matters. Now more than ever, our world needs kindness. Say, Thank You, and offer compliments. "I like your scarf" can make someone smile -- we need more smiles!
5. You WILL Survive – you HAVE survived! Most of you found you are more resilient than you imagined. You bounced, you flexed, you adapted. Then you did it again the next day. And the next. It was not fun AND now you know you can, the next time (and there will be a next time).
6. A Lot of People are Afraid. Fear immobilizes, and you learned that the antidote to fear is movement. For some of you that meant reaching out, taking action, or taking a stand. For others it was dance, yoga, play or simple walking that helped you create a different energy.
7. Take Nothing for Granted. Meeting for coffee. Attending services. Grocery shopping. Seeing a doctor. Chatting with neighbors. Hugs!!
8. Wearing a Mask can be BOTH a sign of oppression AND an expression of concern for others. When in doubt, many of you shared, you found that focusing on others instead of self took away the sting.

On Your Inner Life

9. You can live well AND slower. Many of you reconnected with Patience, Silence, Stillness, and Sleep. “I can slow down and still get everything done. I don’t have to rush everywhere, all the time.”
10. You realized the power of practice. To grow stronger, you had to “exercise” your Gratitude, Resilience, Perseverance, and Creativity muscles.
11. You noticed the ordinary and appreciated it. What you took for granted before is more visible now: Friends, running water, feeling safe, grocery shopping.

Life Lessons

12. Life can be short or long, up or down. That’s what makes it all interesting, challenging and rewarding.
13. “Health is my most valuable resource.” Many people shared this lesson, a new appreciation for the miracle of good health and the need to protect and nurture it through self-care.
14. A couple close friends and family will get you through anything. Especially the ones who accept you as you are. Even if you occasionally want to strangle them <grin>.
15. “Things” are not so important.
16. History matters. I took time this year to learn and face the ugly truth of history. Truth matters: I need to embrace it. Honesty and decency matter, all the time.
17. The gods laugh at our plans. Yep!
18. People say yes…if you ask. You never asked before. Forced to depend on others, it turns out that others want to help. Some of you shared stories of crippling loss, and every story concluded with friends – and strangers – offering support. We are kind by default, not by exception.
19. You are not ‘too old’ to learn technology. Many of you shared your wonder that you are now an expert in video conferencing, file sharing, and online interactions!

On Family & Home

20. You saw your family thru new lenses. “I learned my son is hysterical in class and tells the teachers EVERYTHING!” (yikes!)
21. Virtual learning does not work as well as in-person learning. ‘nuf said.
22. Dogs love a good pandemic, because you’re always home. Woof!
23. We missed a lot, yet we managed. Graduations, weddings, funerals, births, new jobs. We missed our rituals, yet life went on in new and creative patterns.
24. Call your mother. Or dad. Never more than in the past year have we been in touch with the fragility of life, especially for our elders.
25. Your closets are clean! Since you had nowhere to go and only had to wear one outfit per month, many of you purged, folded, or organized…everything. You’ve learned to enjoy your home more and do with less.
26. You were more PRESENT to your family. “Family is everything. I’ll say it again, Family is everything. Love, compassion, frustration, anger, grief, laughter, grief, tears, joy, relief – all good!”
27. You’re a damn good parent. Or sibling, or aunt, or friend. You realized that. You rock!

On Work and Leadership

28. My Ego was in charge before. “I learned I am not needed in the office as much as I was going in; I can better assist in other ways.”
29. BUSY is different from PRODUCTIVE. “Holy shit, I wasted so much time being visible at work and now all that matters is getting stuff done.”
30. Women Leaders Rock! Women-led countries handled the lockdown best (e.g., NZ, DE, BE). They listened to the experts, used consensus decision-making and common sense to control the virus, demonstrated compassion, and lead by example.
31. Coworkers are People – Be Kind. Video meetings showed us people’s lives. Our CEO gently pushing his youngest child off camera view during a town hall; hearing our president's dog barking; seeing inside of someone's home…reminders they have complex lives outside of how I know them. Appearances are deceiving. 
32. Managers and Leaders are not the same. Many of you shared stories of line managers losing it while non-managerial associates served as the voices of calm and reason.
33. Crisis Fuels Creativity. “This forced us all to be a little more creative in not only our engagement with clients but also with each other.”
34. WFH (work from home) is terrible and wonderful. You can’t wait for it to end AND you want to keep it available to you.
35. The “interruptions” WERE my work! “Those constant interruptions and complaints I had before, I felt like I couldn’t get my work done, I miss them.” Those interactions were an important part of your day, especially for the extraverts!
36. Lightness is important. “More than ever, I need to laugh when appropriate and to lead by example.”
37. Compassionate Leadership is worth its weight in gold. Boom.

On Happiness

38. “I have a warm house and food on the table.” Many people don’t.
39. Happiness is in constant flux. “I appreciate it when it's there and accept it when not.”
40. You get to choose your own happiness, not others. “I am done giving others that power over me. My life is great and I’m going to live every day acting that way. If I make a mistake, I own it and move on. No more allowing it to ruin more time and energy than it is worth.”

Focus on the World

41. Internet Access is as Vital as Water and Electricity. None of these systems are in great shape. The pandemic revealed the fragility and inequities of our infrastructures (in the US).
42. Nature is Resilient – When We Give It a Chance. Taking cars from the road and grounding planes reduced carbon emissions resulting in clear skies in many parts of the world. If it took a pandemic to prove that we are a cause AND that Mother Nature can bounce back, great. “The question remains: will we give her a chance once we’re vaccinated?”
43. We get to choose what we see in others. We can either focus on the good of the human race or we can get dragged through the mud. “I believe that most people are good, and I refuse to let anything tarnish that belief.”
44. Many people don’t give a shit until it affects them. People die from diseases, lose their jobs, face systemic oppression and numerous -isms, lack essentials to live, and deal with daily food shortages far more dire than what some of us experienced in 2020, ALL THE TIME. For a while we were more aware of all that. It’s sad it took this crisis to bring to awareness; on the hopeful side, perhaps more people will be less self-ish in the future.

Future Focus

45. You Need to Take Care of You. “In 2021, my #1 focus will be self-care (physical, spiritual and emotional health). My #2 focus will be spending time with and appreciating loved ones.” The lockdown reconnected a lot of you with your values in a powerful way.

I am grateful to all who shared your wisdom.  Keep learning, keep practicing gratitude, and keep moving forward.

I end this sharing with the mantra my friend Lamar has used on all his emails in the past year.

Stay positive and test negative!

Remember, Leadership is not about a title: Anyone can be a leader who finds the strength to dance with adversity and invites others to do the same.

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